If you have caught yourselves that again you grumble on second half for not washed up ware, which again you should be wash up, obviously it is time to you to reconsider your relations about justice of distribution of duties and discrimination to which you are exposed in this area.
When we feel that we are deprived of the fair relation, insults and irritation on the partner start to be multiplied. To reach justice in relations it is possible by finding a compromise. It is important to remember, however, that the compromise in relations is not exact balance, and the flexible scheme of clearings “you to me – I to you”. I will try to give you some tips, how it is possible to make your relations better and get your ex back if you have broken up already.
1. Reconsider the expectations. Think that would be for you ideal in all areas of mutual relations – in a life, in planning of the family budget, in sex, education of children and the other areas potentially opened for the conflict. Discuss the expectations with the partner. Be ready to that your opinion cannot coincide with opinion of the partner. Be ready to make a compromise. Be not confused: as soon as you define for yourselves that you consider fair, it will be easier to you to create new system of values which will work for both.
2. Conversation instead of scandal. Instead of making scandal on a theme of the ware not washed up once again (though promised!) try to talk to him about it. Tell something like: “I know that you have got tired after work, but after all I too have got tired. Perhaps, next time, you will wash up ware, and I will put it into place?” In this case it is better to tell about the needs a spice-cake method. Besides, the similar compromise to form at your feeling of a team: first, you show that well realize and understand his feelings and requirement, and secondly – offer ways to overcome the potential conflict joint efforts.
3. Be grateful. Even if he has made something not so, praise him for effort to make a compromise. We will admit, he has washed up ware in a bowl, but has forgotten about a dirty frying pan on a plate. It is not necessary to specify in an error, tell to the partner of a word of sincere gratitude is better. Thus, you strengthen trust of the partner to yourselves, and he, in turn, will be inspired and will feel in himself forces more often to make a compromise.
4. Change game rules. Compromise conditions vary with change of vital way: you have the child, and you should distribute duties on care of it, or you have moved to the big apartment which cleaning demands more time and forces, etc. One of conditions of the good and correct compromise consists in readiness to reconsider its parameters at the moment of change of vital circumstances. This original audit of compromises will present to you many happy moments and will strengthen relations.
It is almost impossible to escape the cases when you face the how to get your ex back situation. The biggest mistake here is that people think too much about how to get your ex back, instead of putting this whole story in another way. This is not about how to get your ex back, really. It is about how to make it exciting again.
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